Infantreflux.org | Feeling like a cruddy mommy!

This topic has 14 replies, 1 voice, and was last updated 19 years, 3 months ago by Anonymous.

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July 31, 2007 at 2:04 pm #40225

Anonymous
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Geez,

I feel like such a terrible mother. We have struggled a lot to get tummy-time in everyday with Kate b/c she loathes it soooo much. She likes it better now sorta. I tried babywearing with her at about three months old but she HATED being enclosed and not able to have her hands free. Well, now her head control is pretty good so she’s in the exersaucer(wooo-hooo!)and LOVES the baby-bjorn(I HATE it! It hurts my back so much so I just ordered a nicer,softer, easier on her chubby legs mei-tai)facing out. Well, today she has been fussy,fussy,fussy. I swear she’s working on those stinkin’ teeth! So around 1pm we went for a walk. I put a little sunscreen on her but I was desperate for fresh air and she doesn’t like her carseat so much anymore. Well, we live in Indiana and it’s really hot today. I wasn’t thinking!!! I took my poor baby out in the heat of the day. Like I couldn’t wait untill later in the afternoon to get fresh air! I just read a couple of my reference parenting books and they all say direct sunlight is terrible and causes increased risk for cancer,damages skin and a bunch of other terrible things!!! Kate’s NEVER out in the sun but I feel so awful that I wasn’t thinking. Well, thinking of me not herThis cranky old lady on our walk(total of 10 min tops!!)made some smart comment like ” it’s too hot for baby”!!! Sorry, I just needed to vent.

July 31, 2007 at 2:17 pm #40227

Anonymous
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Don’t feel bad!! She’s got to see the sun some time! Do you think our parents shielded us from the sun, let alone slathered us with as much sunscreen as we do now?? I remember I was about 3 years old & fell asleep outside & my mom left me there b/c I was sleeping so nicely! I ended up completely burnt–and I’m fine!!! (Although today I’m sure someone would call the cops on us!) That cranky old lady would have foudn something else to complain about if it were nighttime or cloudy–that’s their specialty, finding fault in how others parent! So don’t feel bad, as long as mommy is happy, baby is happy…

July 31, 2007 at 2:58 pm #40231

Anonymous
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I take Brian out for walks every day during the day and it’s been in the 90’s here every day. They can be out in the sun as long as its not for an extended period of time. I do put sunscreen on his arms and legs and a floppy hat on his head. Don’t worry, I’m sure she is fine and probably enjoying the fresh air as much as you are!

July 31, 2007 at 3:52 pm #40234

Anonymous
Inactive

Oh Claire,

Don’t be so hard on yourself! You and baby obiviously needed to get out of the house!

We live in Nebraska and it’s hotter than blazes right now, but I can’t keep my 3 1/2 yr old cooped up b/c of Owen. We are outside all the time and yes I try to keep him out of the sun, but it doesn’t happen. Especially now that he can crawl!

You’re a great mommy and you are trying to do what’s best for both of you. Don’t worry about cranky old ladies, they were the ones who didn’t let their kids have any fun! Kate will grow up to be one well adjusted little babe! Don’t worry about that!

July 31, 2007 at 5:12 pm #40237

Anonymous
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Don’t be so hard on yourself!… and ignore all the cranky people who like to toot their horns. Drives me crazy! Why can’t people just mind their own business????

July 31, 2007 at 6:12 pm #40240

Anonymous
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Thanks girls!I just felt like such a dummy. I should know better but you know in the end, I’m trying not to strive to be the perfect mom(it’s HARD!!!), just the one that’s good enoughThanks for the encouragement!! I felt pretty low.

July 31, 2007 at 6:52 pm #40245

Anonymous
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Claire,

I think you are way too hard on yourself! You are an excellent mommy to Kate. There are always little old ladies who are ready to scold us mommies LOL. We went out to eat one day at a local restaurant, and Caden was chewing on a brand new shoe (one of those soft soled shoes at Target similar to the Robeez). Anyway, a little elderly couple at the table next to us started discussing the fact that Caden was chewing on his shoe. Next, I heard the man say loudly, “Well, he must be starving to death!” I about DIED laughing, because Caden has these chubby legs with ROLLS!

I just think people feel the need sometimes to be nosy and intrude for whatever reason. We have encountered this on other occasions too. When we went to adopt our baby girl from China, we were scolded numerous times by elderly ladies for not having her covered up enough even though it was hot as anything! So, I think it’s common for older ladies to feel the need to give advice on child care even when they are complete strangers! (and not just in the U.S.)

I’m sure one outing in the heat of the day won’t harm Kate in any way. I bet the fresh air did you good anyway, and you deserved it. From your posts, it is evident that you give a LOT to Kate. You have to take care of yourself sometimes too. Of course I say that, and I am just as bad! Everyone always tells me that I have to take care of myself too. I guess I’m good at giving advice that I need to follow myself

July 31, 2007 at 6:57 pm #40247

Anonymous
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Claire,

sometimes we need a little fresh air. Don’t be so hard on yourself. 10minutes isn’t going to hurt her in the least. Cooper has been blessed with my super pale skin and I hate to take him out in the sun, but it is inevitable and well he is going to be in the sun soon enough when I don’t have control so I figure get his little skin used to it now in small doses. When she is 6months old, just slather her with sunscreen and go have some fun, until then, just keep her shaded as much as possible and she will be fine. I know her skin is probably as fair as Cooper’s by looking at her picture.

July 31, 2007 at 7:04 pm #40249

Anonymous
Inactive

Emily- You’re such a sweetie! Always there to lift me up

Beth-It’s funny you say that about her skin. My skin is very very olivy but her daddy’s pretty casper-ish She definately has more my skin though. It must just be the picture When she was born she was WAY darker. I remember dh came home one day right after Kate was born and said that he had shown her pic to a co-worker and she said “Wow.I didn’t know you were married to an African american woman!” Pretty funny. My dad’s tall and VERY white and mom is a 4ft 9 guamanian lady. Very cute.

July 31, 2007 at 10:41 pm #40254

hellbennt
Keymaster

gotta dash but I have to say one word: solerveil!!!

if you know anyone who sews, I would buy some solerveil & get a throw kind of blanket made out of it- and a hat

I have a solerveil sling that I drape on Ari (or wear him in it, lol)

that stuff is awesome!!!

here’s to buy the fabric: http://www.solarveil.com/fabric.asp

I have 2 outfits (1 for each boy) w/ a hooded coverup/shirt & pants

that a mama on TBW makes- they’ll wear it in december when we go on a family vacation to the beach

August 1, 2007 at 6:52 am #40256

Anonymous
Inactive

I agree with Laura!… we LOVED sunveil (a similar line)….www.sunveil.com . When she was that age I used to have a throw that went right over the stroller.

August 1, 2007 at 9:06 am #40257

Anonymous
Inactive

I agree with everyone else…don’t beat yourself up! Last summer when
things were SO bad with Sarah I HATED being stuck inside. We took a
lot of walks later in the evening and I still worried that it was too
hot. I’m sad to say that we haven’t spent much time outside this
summer either because I’m still to afraid of the sun and heat. It’s so
hard!

Where is that perfect climate where it’s 70-80 degrees year round? Anyone know…maybe we’ll MOVE!

I also LOVE Kate’s new picture too! I have been meaning to ask, is her name Kate or is Kate short for something else? I really like that name and have already been starting to *think* about future baby names!

August 1, 2007 at 10:48 am #40260

Anonymous
Inactive

Y’all can come out to Texas for awhile if you want to – we have had the weirdest summer with cool temperatures and rain most days. I’ve lived here my whole life and can only remember 2 or 3 summers as nice as this one. It’s usually over 100 degrees most days by now, but not this year!

August 1, 2007 at 11:51 am #40265

Anonymous
Inactive

Thanks Amy. Nope, just Kate. Her middle name is Mary after my great grandmother We went back and forth veto-ing eachother’s names while I was pregnant and Kate we LOVED from the very beginning. I can’t imagine any other name being more perfect for her.

August 1, 2007 at 2:18 pm #40275

Anonymous
Inactive

Claire, I’m sure that Kate was just fine outside. I always worry about Ben out there for too long. We’re in NC, and it’s hotter than hell here, but my 3 1/2 yr. old can’t wait to go outside everyday. I hate slopping on all that sunscreen on his sensitive skin, but he LOVES being outdoors. Even when he’s a cranky mess, he’ll perk right up when we go outside.
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