Is this force feeding?

[Anonymous]

Lori : I cook meat and veggie then puree it, or I puree the Gerber Graduate, or oatmeal mix with chicken broth, or stage 2 -3 food. He can only handle small piece of table food, piece by piece only, but not the whole spoonful. We saw the ped last Tuesday, she said it is ok that he can not eat table food yet. I am ok with that too, as long as he is eating.

[Anonymous]

Sharon,

Of course, check with your doc before changing things… But, I know with my first daughter, by 1 year, she ate a more ‘adult’ like schedule. Meaning, she’d wake up have breakfast (eggs, or waffle, etc.–she had no allergies, etc.!!) with some milk (or in your case, you could offer formula from a sippy), then a mid-morning snack around 9 or 10. Then lunch (purees, cheese, etc.) with some milk in a sippy, then snack around 3 or so, dinner (same as lunch), & that was it. We offered sippy cups of milk throughout the day, as well as water. She is very healthy–even though some days I was so worried because of how little she was eating.

I need to preface that with that fact that Madi had no health issues as a baby, unlike Emma. With his weight, has he always been lower on the charts? That could be, like you said, hereditary. Most docs only worry when a child goes from a certain % & then drops, & continues to drop for an extended period of time. If his health, other than the reflux is good, then you have some flexibility in his food & consumption. With his kidneys, you defenitely want to make sure he is getting adequate fluids. But, it may be he now wants to eat with you & your husband. At this age, he is becoming a more social being & wants to mimic what you are doing. He may want to be with you at the table, eating what you are eating, drinking from a cup, etc. It seemed that Madi ‘grew up’ over night. One day she was nursing or taking a bottle, the next all she wanted was sippy cup & to eat on her own.

I would do a fun picnic, where you offer puffs or other baby-friendly foods, some tofu or other soft solids, & then the puree. Have it be very fun, laugh, sing songs, etc. You can even make themes, like colors, or ABC foods, etc. Make eating a FUN experience for BOTH of you. Get a baby doll & have him ‘feed’ the baby. Throw a party–buy some party supplies of a character he likes & have an impromptu ‘party’ for you, your husband, & Brian. Get some party plates, hats, & noisemakers, a balloon, etc. Just a few festive touches. Then serve the meal & a desert (whatever type he can have), regardless of what he eats of the real meal. Don’t focus these meal activities on eating, focus on the fun. If you incorporate these fun food experiences every now & again, he’ll associate eating as a pleasureable experience. And, since it’s not every meal you are doing this, his weight won’t suffer.

If that is not the case, most speech therapists will probably say that whatever you need to do to get your child to eat is fine. So, giving him spoonfuls while he plays, watching tv while he eats, etc. is fine–for now. You will have to watch as he gets older, toddlers are creatures of habit. And, he may end up becoming used to eating while watching TV, etc. & throw a fit and refuse to eat if that’s what he wants. But, that’s something that will simply be one of the many parent-toddler ‘debates’ that you’ll encounter!

Good luck, I hope his eating gets better. It can be tough, trust me, we know all about the stress that mealtime can create. Hang in there!!

[Anonymous]

Sorry it took so long to get back to you. I did the same thing as you are doing with Alexis’. I did continue to feed her even though she hated it. Alexis was on a very similiar schedule but I made her drink almost 18 oz of milk since she never snacked on anything. There were many times that she fussed so much even though she was watching a movie during meals, I would stop feeding her for 10-15 mins let her go do what she wanted to do and then restart feeding her again. Starting her on table food was hard since she never like other kids desired to eat nor ever took anything off my plate to put in her mouth. We started with a little more textured foods gerber graduates and I started to put the mini cheez its on her food tray and she would grab at those and eat them between my spoonfuls. One day her grandfather was eatting white rice and she picked some up and ate it herself and really loved it, so that was on her tray with every meal, it gave her something to do and not be so unhappy with me feeding her. We realized that she hated her highchair most likely due to so many bad times, we just switched her to a one of those high chairs that strap to a regular chair and pushed her up against the table so she would feel like a big girl. She slowly moved to table food such as little pieces of grilled cheese and hot dogs I usually had her eat some of the hot dog in addition to the gerber graduate mashers which she liked, but the problem we ran into was her chipmunking her food. She still chipmunks food esp. things that she just doesn’t seem to like. I don’t know how she does it but if we give her a spoonful of rice with some very small piece of meat, she will chew and swallow all of the rice but keep the pieces of meat in her checks and still be able to drink out of her cup. Anyways, give it time, Alexis’ case she needed a lot of time, she is almost 2 years old and finally feeding some foods herself such as pancakes and scrambled eggs. Most of the time I’m still running around chasing her down with a spoon. She is also snacking a lot more, we put out little bowls full of snack foods all over the house so whenever she wants she can go pick up a cheerio, or cracker and eat it on her own.

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