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This is a new topic for me since Thanksgiving and Christmas will be my first “big” holidays with a baby. I am already stressing out about the numerous trips we’ll be making! The farthest we will have to drive is 3 hours…so I’m lucky the rest of family is close by…but I’m still dreading it.
I always feel such pressure for Sarah to be in a good mood for everyone. Does anyone else feel like this? I guess I’m more worried about if she’ll be having a good day or a bad day. Both Thanksgiving and especially Christmas will be one visit after another…so somewhere along the line Sarah is bound to be fussy. These holidays are the only time we see most of our extended families…actually most of MY family in general. (besides my parents) Thus the added pressure for Sarah to be “charming and cute” since most of my family hasn’t seen her since she was a newborn. The rest of our family that has been around her pretty much only knows the “cranky” Sarah from BEFORE meds. I hate being known as the girl with the baby who cried all the time.
Am I being silly or does anyone else stress about this kind of thing?
Amy
I packed my sling(s)
and hoped for the best!At Jonah’s first Thanksgiving, we thought he was SO GOOD
– he was on a good dose of PPI; he was so much better than those crazy nightmare days & nights!Come to find out, my family really felt bad for us having to deal with him! We were so shocked, for we thought he was so much better! Ah, naive bliss…just goes to show it’s all relative…
Vital Touch: How Intimate Contact with Your Baby Leads to Happier, Healthier Development, by Sharon Heller PH.D. http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0805053549
prove ’em wrong!
I have no family here either and holidays are lonely to say the least. For Thanksgiving I was so blessed to meet a couple who are new in town and also have no family in the state, so I invited them over for Thanksgiving. I’m thrilled about but I am a nervous wreck at the same time. Myles (even having outgrown his reflux) can be a challenge. So not only do I have to cook (I’m not a great cook) but I’m worried and praying that Myles behaves himself…although I realize these people are parents, too and surely their little angel (they only have one now) has had her moments. I think overall people (especially parents) are more understanding and less judgmental than we think.
So, like Kathleen said…try to be thankful you have family close enough to see for the holidays…but honestly I understand your anxiety. I dread taking Myles to his Kindermusik class each week because he’s so naughty and the other babies are all so pleasant. Lately, I’m trying to just laugh about it. It feels better than stresses over it.
I hope it goes well and Sarah charms the pants off everyone, but if she doesn’t they will all still love her and you.
Happy Thanksgiving!Kathleen and Christine – I didn’t mean to make it sound like I am not thankful for getting to see family…I am very thankful. We are lucky that most family lives nearby. It was just the silly stress of whether Sarah would “behave” or not. I would probably have that same stress even if she was a “perfect” baby because I’m weird like that.
Sarah also hasn’t really warmed up to anyone but my mom so I also hate the hurt feelings of other family members who are still convinced that Sarah doesn’t “like” them!!! I hope you both have a wonderful holiday. Kathleen – I like your idea of making our OWN tradition if needed…we’ll see how this year goes.
Amy
Amy
I don’t stress about the holidays because I’ve learned that over the years, they will enivitable be a funny-disastrous event!This year we will also go to my brother in law’s thanksgiving thing, which will be VERY interesting seeing as he hates me (literally, he’s TOLD me) and has made no attempt to even see Aidan since he was born.
I don’t allow either of my boys around ciggarette smoke and if someone has been smoking outside, they have to wash their hands before holding Aidan. And can’t go near Austin for about 20 mins (he’s highly sensitive to smoke). I also told my hubby that if I so much as heard someone WHISPER a curse word around Austin or Aidan then we’ll leave. So the chances of us being there more than oh say 20 mins are slim. I’m also looking forward to watching everyone fawn over Aidan but ignore Austin..my husband is his stepdad and in their family, only blood matters, they’ve always treated Austin like he doesn’t exist.(sometimes I hate people
)Aidansmom792006-11-20 22:14:57
i often get pushed to my breaking point when my mil or father comes for a visit (accompanied by their more enlightened and less self-involved spouses) because hannah has never quite reacted well to either of them or as amy said “doesn’t like them”. they will both be here (dad for thanksgiving through hannah’s bday and mil for hannah’s bday), so i have the pressure of cooking and catering to three babies. its really hard because i want the grown-up to act like grown-ups and just chill out. hannah is also an undeniable mommy’s girl, much to the dismay of my mil, who isn’t especially fond of who i am — much like hannah, very independent and outspoken in our own ways. so as an extension of me, these selfish people feel it is ok to be rude.
very rude. and judgemental.
so, to be thankful for family, yes, but since i am not a drinker, i just try to let it all go for the sake of the holidays and hope no one has a tantrum.
happy thanksgiving!!
Amy,
I didn’t think you weren’t thankful for being with your family either.
I really do understand why you’re nervous. I always worry about how my children are going to behave….whether it’s around family, at church, at kindermusik….they always seem to find a way to embarrass me. But I think it’s like that for all parents. One day two or three years from now you’ll be sitting at the table with family and little Sarah will blurt out something inappropriate or repeat something out of context and you’ll turn red in the face. Or she’ll throw a tyrannical, toddler tantrum and you’ll want to crawl under the table and hide. I have three and I’m still learning to take it in stride.Jill,
I feel so bad for Austin. He doesn’t deserve to be treated that way.
It’s really shocking that any adult could be that insenstive to any child. 
What’s wrong with them? I’m sure you tell Austin that they are the ones with the problem and that he deserves much better. He and Aidan sure are lucky to have you for a mommy.Lori,
I hope you can laugh now when you look at that picture. The funniest thing about it to me is the expression on Sarah’s face. She looks like she’s thinking, “There she (Hailey) goes again!” Yes, it’s too bad we’re so far away. We’d have some interesting and funny stuff to talk about over the Thanksgiving table.
I’d love to show you the pictures from Ellie’s first six months. She always looked stressed, like she was expecting some impending doom. I laugh about it now but I worried sick about her when she was a baby. And now I worry about Myles’ “attitude” and temper. Hopefully in the future I can laugh about that, too.ndrose2006-11-21 13:58:38
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